The 13th apostle

I was in church with my parents yesterday. Every Saturday i take them to church. The priest that was celebrating mass was a very old priest, maybe in his late 70s. He was quoting Jesus - "not every one that calls me Lord, Lord will go to heaven but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven'. According to the priest, not all who pray to Jesus will go to heaven. He was using the "word of God" many times in his sermon. He says we should spend 15 minutes a day of the "word of God" every day. Surely we can do that he said. My mind wondered away....Is the bible the word of God? How could this old experienced priest, still believe that the bible is the word of God? The bible has contradictions, it leaves many gaps..it is sometimes ambiguous. My mind wondered to the book i just finished reading - 'The Thirteenth Apostle' by Michel Benoit.

The book makes an interesting observation on the death of Judas- the bible says Judas went out and hanged himself - matthew 27:5. The bible also says Judas fell headlong and he burst assunder in the midst and all his bowels gushed out' - Acts 1:18. Firstly how are there two versions as to how Judas died? Secondly, I have not heard of a man's bowels being gushed out when he is hanged. Thirdly i have not heard of a man's bowels coming out if he had fallen headlong. In the language lawyers- the story is inherently improbable. For his bowels to be gushed out, it is more probable that he had been murdered maybe by someone stabbing a knife into his belly and disemboweling him. Who did this? Read the 13th apostle.

What if there was a 13th apostle? What if he wrote the original gospel which is today known as the Gospel according to John. What if his name was not John? What if he was the 'beloved disciple' mentioned in John. Christians believe that John was the beloved disciple mentioned in the Gospel of John. What if it was not the apostle John who wrote it but a 13th apostle? What if the 13th apostle, frustrated that the other gospels of his day did not truly tell the truth about Jesus wrote his gospel (today known as the Gospel of John)? What if the early church unhappy with this new gospel, altered it to the gospel known as the Gospel of John today? What if this 13th apostle being frustrated that his gospel had been altered, wrote another epistle which was hidden/suppressed for ages until discovered recently in the 20th century at Qumran together with the dead sea scrolls? What if it says that Jesus was not God?. That the 12 apostles and saint Paul, driven by political ambitions deified him? What if the newly found epistle says that the Essenes, a sect to which Jesus belonged, stole his body to give it a proper burial? That Jesus' bones now lies in a tomb in the desert sands between Jerusalem and the Red Sea? What if the Church will do ANYTHING to keep this 13th apostle's epistle from the masses- if not it would mean it's end? What if the Church's only truth was it's need to establish and maintain power, that it would not tolerate any truth but its own? Dreaming? Or an attack of paranoia? That would mean that the Koran was correct- that Jesus was a prophet of God.

Quesiton - Would it make a difference if Jesus was not God? That he was just a prophet? That he did not ressurect from the dead? It would not make much difference to me. We would still have the person of Jesus, his gestures, his words- which are exceptional. Jesus had this vision of inner Awakening, which all great spiritual masters possess. This vision enabled him to see Nathan-ael under the fig tree, eventhough this was outside his immediate field of vision. Jesus taught that everything can be known only from within. Abstract knowledge is merely a rind. You need to get pass it to reach the heart, the sapwood of real knowledge. This is true of minerals, plants, living beings. It is also true of the gospels. Truth was not contained in any text however sacred it may be. It lay beyond words printed on paper, words uttered by human mouths. It lay in the heart of silence. The ancients called it inner knowledge- 'gnosis'. Buddha knew about it. The sufis knew about it. Prophet Muhammad knew about it.

So even if the elderly priest is wrong, even if the Church is wrong, the ignorant priests and the Church are a necessary evil. The continued abuse of power and deception of the Church must not lead us to forget that it is a repository of treasure- the person of Jesus. And without the church, we would never have known Jesus. Whether or not Jesus is God, whether or not he resurrected from the dead, whether or not he died for the sins of the world, whether or not his bones lie somewhere in the desert in the middle east, it don't matter to me. Jesus enlightened the world with his wisdom. The world is a richer place because of Jesus. I think it is a good idea to read the words of Jesus for 15 minutes a day as suggested by the elderly priest. We can only be wiser, better people when the words or spirit of Jesus reach our hearts daily. As Jesus said -

It is the Spirit that gives life, the flesh profits nothing.
The words that i speak to you are Spirit and they are life - john
6:63

One may ask "how do you know jesus said that?" Do you think one always needs to know facts in order to be acquainted with realities? In spiritual matters, everything can only be known from within. My answer is because my heart is in harmony with it. It strikes a chord within me.